Friday, March 30, 2012

A BUZZARD EGG OMELET #10




OK, I get it – and I empathize:  Women have always been subjugated by men.   They are portrayed by religion as sinful, lustful, succubus looking to lead boys and men into debauchery.  They have been portrayed by husbands as nitwits to be made fun of, and by business as emotionally unstable hires that aren’t as dependable as men.

Now the government wishes to control their sexuality and reproductive life; going so far as to enact state mandated rape. 

My question is: Females are over fifty percent of the population…and they have the vote…why is this an issue?



I’m just asking.
the Ol’Buzzard


THEY ARE JUST ABOUT ALL GONE




I remember talking to my mother just before she died.  She had outlived all her friends and relatives.   She said she dreamed a lot, and everybody she dreamed of was dead.

I don’t have those dreams; mainly because I don’t have any friends or family that I have ever kept in touch with.  

But today I have been thinking about the death of Earl Scruggs.   As a young man in the military in the early sixties I was a country fan before it was blue grass.  I would listen to Earnest Tubb, Hank Williams, Johnny Cash and the real bluegrass – Flatt and Scruggs.   I had a half dozen Flatt and Scruggs albums; and I’d get drunk and try to pick and sing “You're Not A Drop in the Bucket When It Comes To Loving Me.


All those albums are long gone, but those songs more than anything else bring back memories that seem like another world – another time and  place in some parallel universe that doesn’t exist - and never existed - in today’s reality.

Well, I couldn’t find “A Drop In The Bucket” but here is some Flatt and Scruggs at their best.


and one more from:The Story of Bonnie and Clyde.




the Ol'Buzzard

Wednesday, March 28, 2012

A BUZZARD EGG OMELET #9


THE WORLD IS TOO PREDICTABLE

The weather in Maine this year has astounded even the old folks.  We had a modicum of snow in January and a few nights of below zero in February; but, then in March temperatures rose as much as fifty degrees above average for this time of year.  Last week the temperatures were near eighty degrees (unheard of) then two days ago the temps dropped back into the thirties.  Today we woke up to snow.



Now I am not complaining about the weather – my rub is the forecast.   In the case of our weather the forecasters were spot on.  

What a bummer.

I can remember a time when you would wake up and be surprised at the weather.   An unexpected snow was a marvel – something to be talked about and experienced. 

Today you know what is coming and there is no mystery and amazement.  So many mysteries of life have been co-opted by technology – and not necessarily for the good.   

Predictability is the drudge of routine.
the Ol'Buzzard

Saturday, March 17, 2012

MARVELOUS CURES SOON TO BE AVAILABLE


Oops!

During the twelfth century there are records of the Christian church forbidding the practice of medicine.   People who attempted to comfort the sick and the dying were often proclaimed witches or heretics and tortured and killed.   Though opiates were available they were forbidden for the relief of pain for the seriously injured.   It was felt that pain was God given and to interfere with it was heresy.   Priest often administered treatment by touching the infirmed with the bone of a saint, and with prayer. 



This was the teaching drawn from a book that was written by a primitive desert people who considered a wheelbarrow cutting edge technology.


In 1998 biologist James Thomson at the University of Wisconsin cultivated the first line of human embryonic stem cells.   The work was revolutionary and offered potential cures for cancer, Alzheimer, Parkinson, HIV; as well as the ability to grow and replace damaged organs and tissue.   But this curative research required the destruction of human embryos.

When our President George W. Bush, supported by the fundamentalist ignorant still clinging to two thousand year old religious dogma, restricted the use of human embryonic stem cells the genetic advancement in the treatment of human infirmity screeched to a stop.  

In the years since, numerous biologists have attempted to create compatible stem cells by regressing adult human cells back to an embryonic stage.  In every case when these regressed cells were tested they were attacked by the human immune system and destroyed.  

The misconception promulgated by the religious right has been that stem cells would be procured from aborted fetuses and that women would become pregnant in order at sell their fertilized eggs for money; again, stirring up the female phobia of the Republican base.   In actuality the cells would have been produced in a Petri Dish that would never have advanced to a fetus. 

The fetus obsession and scientific ignorance of the Republican base has retarded our medical research and condemned the suffering and dying to new decades without relief. 

But after all, suffering is God’s design, and all advancements of science must be held suspect – or denied if it doesn’t mesh with the teachings of the Primitive Age Tome that should rule all our lives.

  the Ol'Buzzard

Tuesday, March 13, 2012

A BUZZARD EGG OMELET #8

AN ATTEMPT AT POETRY - OF SORTS



There ain’t no bacon in heaven
Cause God won’t let’ye eat pigs
You can’ eat ham or sausage
So what-d-u have with your eggs?

But wait:

You can’t eat eggs in heaven
Cause that’s a chicken’s abortion you-see
No over-easy eggs or omelets
So that ain’t heaven to me.

I don’t want milk and honey
I don’t want tofu and sprouts
If that’s all you eat in heaven
You’re welcome to leave me out

Just give-me pickled eggs and slim jims
And a bottle of bourbon that free
And a willing girl with big tits
And that’ll be heaven for me. 



 the Ol'Buzzard

Monday, March 12, 2012

RHETORICAL QUESTIONS


SEX, SEX, AND MORE SEX

Sexual progressive cultures gave us literature, philosophy, civilization and the rest, while sexual restrictive cultures gave us the Dark Ages and the Holocaust.
225,000 years of Erotic Freedom
By Alan Moore Abrams


What the hell is wrong with these people?   Rush raved about young women promiscuously having sex, sex, sex; while Santorum declared that sex should be for procreation and not for pleasure.  

As a red blooded male I can’t see any downside to women willing to have sex.  For me, that has always been a situation much to be desired. 

One more Axe to grind:  Young men in high school that get laid by a good looking teacher and then complain…what kind of bullshit is that?   That would have been my wildest dream and highest aspiration when I was a teen ager.  

the Ol’Buzzard 

Saturday, March 10, 2012

THE ILLUSION OF TIME



“The theory of relativity put an end to the idea of absolute time!   It appeared that each observer must have his own measure of time as recorded by a clock carried with him, and that identical clocks carried by different observers would not necessarily agree.”
A Brief History of Time
By Stephen Hawking 



TODAY’S DATE IS MARCH 10, 2012…. I THINK….. MAYBE I AM WRONG.

This year as we approach Daylight Savings Time, and have to set our clocks forward one hour, we are also living through the four year phenomenon of a leap year. 

The Earth takes 365days, 5 hours, 48 minutes and 46 seconds to make one revolution around the sun. 

At some point in human history man became aware of the cyclic nature of the seasons and very early on primitive cultures designed lunar calendars to predict seasonal changes that affected their life styles. 

Six thousand years ago the Egyptians devised a solar calendar of twelve months of thirty days plus an extra five days.   This was later adopted by the Greeks. The Romans took the Greek calendar and modified it to include a leap year.  Israel and Saudi Arabia still use a modified lunar calendar to this day.

There was no one born on earth and no one died between October 5th and October 14th in the year 1582.

The Julian calendar, a reform of the Roman calendar, was introduced by Julia Caesar in the year 46 BC.   The calendar design was 365 days divided into twelve months with a leap day added to February every four years.   Even with leap day added, this calendar was off by eleven minutes a year and so by 1582 the error had accumulated to ten days.  To correct this inconsistency Pope Gregory XIII decreed that the day following October 4th would be called October 15th (skipping ten days.)

Great Britton did not adopt the Gregorian calendar until 1752, at which time they dropped eleven days from September to correct for the time disparagement, and they moved News Years day from March 25th to January 1st.   

You think this is confusing?  The way it actually works is:
Every four years we add a day (February 29,) but every year devisable by 100 we skip the extra day – unless the date is also divisible by 400, in which case we add the day. 

Even with all the adjustments our calendar is still not accurate.  On December 31, 1999 the world stood by for a millennium computer disaster, while fundamentalist Christian churches portended the Rapture would bring about an end of the world.   However, in our western calendar there is no zero-year, so 2001 was actually the beginning of the 21st century, and as far as we can determine the birth of Jesus took place in the year of 4 BC (December 25 is an arbitrary date), so our Christian calendar is off by four years.  


TIME IS OF THE ESSENCE

Time should be considered as Philosophy not Physics – Time is a property of human consciousness, not a factor of the universe.   It is a filing system that humans use to measure certain points during their journey of existence.   The basic elements of the universe, whether subatomic or large, simply go about their business of being matter or energy without regard to how long they have existed.”
Paraphrased from comments by Bob Fish in Discovery Magazine 08/2007

In the early days of America, farmers kept time by a noon mark: a stick at the base of a north/south mark on the ground.  This worked fine until the advent of the railroad.   Railroads had to keep to a time schedule for arrival and departures, and it was impossible to publish a schedule that reflected sun time.   Sun time differed from town to town and city to city: when it was noon in New York City it was 11:55 in Philadelphia; 11: 47 in Washington; 11:35 in Pittsburg - as many as 30 different times could be found in towns on an east/west course across most states. 

In 1847 the railroads proposed a standard time schedule for the US with 4 time zones.  Railroads in England began operating on a standard time schedule in 1880, and in 1883 the railroads in the US began operating on a new standard time schedule. 

Congress called for an international conference to establish international time zones, and at that conference it was decided that the zero time zone be located in England.   In America, Christians opposed the time zones (God’s time, not Vanderbilt’s) and preachers across the country smashed clocks and watches on their pulpits.  When it became obvious that time zones were inevitable Christians wanted Bethlehem to be named the zero time zone.

DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME

Early to bed and early to rise, makes a man healthy, wealthy and wise.
Ben Franklin

Europe enacted Daylight Savings Time (DST) in 1916 during World War One to conserve energy and maximize daylight production.   After the US entered the war in 1917 it switched to DST to maximize factory production.  In 1919 DST was repealed by Congress, but was reinstated during World War Two, though states were allowed to opt out.   In 1966 Congress passed the Uniform Time Act, and at present all states, with the exception of Arizona, observe Daylight Savings Time.

Daylight Savings Time was sold to the public as an adjustment of working hours to allow for more recreational time for workers.  In reality Congress sees an economic basis:  production is higher during daylight hours so on second shifts workers tend to produce more goods during DST, also the extended daylight after work allows more hours for shoppers and increases retail sales.

When I was working I always hated Daylight Savings Time in the spring and loved it in the fall.   To me, the extra hour in bed was always more important than extra daylight after work.

 
 the Ol'Buzzard

Tuesday, March 6, 2012

GOD GUNS AND GAYS


Amendment I
Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.

CONGRESS SHALL MAKE NO LAW RESPECTING AN ESTABLISHMENT OF RELIGION


The Ol’Buzzards rant on religion.  

Most liberal thinkers are appalled at the extreme rhetoric coming from the Republican candidates – but let’s send the chicken home to roost.  These extreme social views are not the product of Republicanism; but are the direct doctrines of religion.   Religion, for millenniums, has taken a pass on its responsibility for the bigotry, ignorance and violence that has exist in the world, and still exist to this day.

The early Greek’s brought us philosophy, science, government, colleges and courts of law.  The Roman’s brought us modern roads, infrastructure, cities and law.   The consolidation of the Christian Church during the sixth century brought us a thousand years of dark ages: a time when knowledge was restricted, science was considered heresy and The Church established theological dogmatism as law via the inquisition. 

During the 17th century The Church gradually lost is strangle hold on Europe, due mainly to the invention of the printing press and the back to back plagues that spread across the Christendom.    But as late as 1600 Giordano Bruno was burned at the stake (bound, his tongue in a gag) by the Catholic Church for publishing the Copernicus theory that the sun was the center of the universe.  In 1633 Galileo was threatened with torture and death on the stake, forcing him to recant his findings of a sun centered universe.  It wasn’t until 1820 that the Papal Inquisition was dismantled; and 1822 that The Church finally acknowledged the sun, and not the earth, was the center of our universe.

Even today religion opposes science, knowledge, free thinking and free inquiry at every turn.  It indoctrinates its followers from childhood with fanciful stories and the promise of life after death.   It is the source of bigotry against other religions, gays, women, atheist and individualism; and it is the driving force that underlies most wars and genocides.  

Today, in the United States, religion brings us:
The assassination of abortion doctors
Hatred of the Moslems
The fear and condemnation of gays
Vilification of women seeking abortions
A drive to control women’s sexuality
Attempted restrictions on everyone’s sexual freedom
A drive to legally control the bodies of women
Legislation of religious ignorance in schools in place of science
Attempted censorship and restriction of books, movies and tapes
An attempt to legislate zygotes as  U.S. citizens
And a concerted drive to transpose the United States into a Christian Theocracy and establish a Christian version of Sharia Law.

And the list goes on ad-nauseam; anywhere you find bigotry, racism, sexism, female-phobia, intolerance and ignorance you will find an undercurrent of religious dogmatism driving the army of the righteous.  

I have no qualm with people attending churches, and people choosing to believe in gods (or goddesses.)  I don’t even have a problem with Jehovah’s Witnesses knocking at my door (I am polite to them, but don’t let them in.)   I do have a problem when self proclaimed holies strive to legislate their religious cant as the law of the land.  I object to “IN GOD WE TRUST” on our money; and prayers - and swearing SO HELP ME GOD at government functions.   I object to religion and religious doctrine being taught in public schools. 

Religion belongs in the homes and in the churches for those wishing to partake; but not in our government and not in my face.

The Ol’Buzzard

The only downside to being an atheist is there is no one to yell to when I have an orgasm.   






Thursday, March 1, 2012

A BUZZARD EGG OMELET #7


HOW TO LOOK BETTER NAKED

Yellow Dog Granny was looking for a recipe for a quick and easy dessert and I suggested this.  It is a quick and easy Blueberry Cobbler that with a little Cool Whip is excellent.  

Spray 8x8 dish with cooking spray.
Pour 1.5 cups of fresh or frozen blueberries into dish (any berry would probably work but we use blueberries because they are plentiful here in Maine.)
Sprinkle 1 package of sugar free Jello over blueberries (any flavor but blueberry as that turns the crust an ugly color – we use strawberry.)
Toss the blueberries to coat.

Mix the following
0.5 cups fat free milk
1 cup of Heart Healthy Bisquick
1 Tbsp. margarine
2 tbsp. water

Pour batter over blueberries
Bake at 375 degrees for 25-30 minutes until crust starts to brown.
Serves 6  (2 points on weight watchers.)

Back in January 2011 my brother-in-laws came up to Maine for a visit.  They are both big men; and a few months before had joined Weight Watchers and had remarkable results.   They kept telling us how easy the program is.   My wife decided she would like to drop ten pounds and since there was a Weight Watchers meeting here in town she decide we would attend. 

The program is a piece of cake – no special foods to buy.   You receive a small book with a list of foods that places a points value for each food.   There is also a Weight Watchers calculator available that will help you assign points for foods not listed in the book.  After you weigh in and tell the consultant how much you want to loose she assign you a daily points value that you must stay within.    Almost all vegetables and fruits are zero points, so the diet is extremely easy to follow and you are never hungry.   Once you get use to figuring your daily poins intake you really don’t need to continue attending the program.  

AND: You can still eat this.


After three months my wife went down one size in her clothing and I dropped from 205 to 185 pounds.  It has been a year now and we still count our points and have not gained the weight back.  Medically: my wife’s doctor has reduced her blood pressure medication by half and now tells her she may be able to discontinue her diabetes medication in the near future; and I feel the best I have in years. 

Actually we have had a life style change:  we eat more whole grains, more vegetables and fruits and do more regular exercise… and I still can drink beer, wine and whiskey … what’s not to like.  

The Ol’Buzzard