Friday, March 30, 2018


I would like to apologize to anyone who was offended by my Easter post. 

But really; believing in Bible stories is like believing in Marvel comic books.   It is comfortable to buy into a philosophy that promises life after death, as long as you don’t question.   Question?   Question!  

So, if I have intruded into your comfort zone I apologize.

The Ol’Buzzard

I can't believe it's not butter!
It's not butter. 


For years I wondered just how white rabbits, colored eggs and yellow chicken candy became part of the Easter celebration.   Perhaps God produced a miracle for the church where rabbits hopped around the cross at night and shit out colored hard-boiled eggs for the guards to find the next morning, and chickens pooped out babies with wings that you see in all the religious pictures.

I don’t know much about the Catholic Church and its teachings; but rabbits and eggs and flying babies seem as logical as statues crying blood, stigmata and exorcism...     

I have recently found that, like most church celebrations, the Catholic clergy interwove pagan rites into their holy days to make them more palatable to the people who were forced to convert. 

and I am not afraid of burning in hell
the Ol'Buzzard

Monday, March 19, 2018


We are just an advanced breed of monkeys on a minor planet of a very average star. But we can understand the universe.  That makes us something special.

Stephen Hawking died on March 13, 2018 

 definitely someone very special
the Ol'Buzzard

Thursday, March 15, 2018


I was raised in the south and I like most southern cooking; but I must admit that southern cooks tend to cook their vegetables until they surrender.  I have seen mustard greens cooked all day with a dash of sugar and some bacon or salt pork, and other vegetables cooked until they are mushy.

I don’t care to cooking meat and vegetables in the slow cooker together, for when the meat is done the vegetables will be overdone.  Also, when meat and vegetables are slow cooked together everything comes out tasting the same.   If you didn’t know what you were eating you couldn’t tell the difference between carrots and potatoes, and except for texture any of the other vegetables cooked at the same are bland. 

So, I cook my meats in the slow cooker, but I steam my vegetables separately – it only takes about fifteen minutes.

Here is a corned beef recipe I am cooking today:
·       I thoroughly rinse the corned beef in cold water and pat it dry.
·       I put a few onions slices and celery stalk in the bottom of the slow cooker to keep the meat off the bottom.
·       I put the corned beef in the slow cooker and cover it with the spices included in the package.
·       I add four cups of water; 2 tbsp of sugar; 2 tbsp cider vinegar; 3 minced garlic cloves; ½ tsp pepper and 2 bay leaves.
·       I cook it on high for at least six hours (eight today.) 
I dice a half a head of cabbage into postage size pieces and add that to the slow cooker about an hour and a half before the meat is done.  I like the cabbage cooked in the slow cooker as it takes on the spicy flavor of the corned beef liquid.   

In my steamer I put carrots and potatoes in the bottom and cover with water.  In the steam top I dice onions.   Bring this to a boil and cook for fifteen minutes until potatoes are done. 

To night we are doing corned beef with cabbage, potatoes and onions; not because we are celebrating the Irish, but because this time of year corned beef is on sell, and we are between snow storms. 

the Ol’Buzzard

Wednesday, March 7, 2018


If you don’t change your watch on 3-11-18 and you get up at 7:30 a.m. it’s not 7:30 but 8:30 because 7:30 came at 6:30, and if you have an appointment between midnight and 1 a.m. on 3-11-18 you are screwed, because from 12:01 am to 12-59 a.m. does not existed.  

But, on 10-03-18 if you make an appointment for 11:30 p.m. you have your choice, because there are two of them.

Does that straighten it out?

the Ol’Buzzard

Monday, March 5, 2018


Be careful when you make fun of old people.  

We had a friend in Kentucky that was in his late seventies.  He would come out to visit us and we would barbecue.   When he walked around the yard he would fart every few steps.   After he had gone we would have a good laugh. 

Now I am in my late seventies.   Pay back is hell – karma always gets you in the end.

the Ol’Buzzard

Friday, March 2, 2018



I don’t kill animals any more.   Somewhere in the aging process I lost my taste of killing.     I do eat meat and I guess that is killing by proxy; but I don’t like seeing an animal dying – especially in the name of a sport.  

I use to have a squirrel problem, but now I buy (bird) squirrel food by the fifty-pound bag.   I once considered it bird feeding, but there is a heard of three big grey squirrels and five red squirrels that I scatter seeds on the ground in order to them keep them off the bird feeders.   This doesn’t even count the half-dozen or so chipmunks that will come out of hibernation sometimes over the next few months.     

If anyone is in the market for a heard of squirrels, please contact me – we can work something out.

What should you call a number of squirrels – a heard, a pod, a pack, a nuisance,  a shit load?  

the Ol’Buzzard


Let's not forget that he became a multi-millionaire selling religion.

the Ol'Buzzard