reading Dan Brown’s Inferno I had to
read Dante’s Divine Comedy:I got through Inferno and half way through
the second section, Purgatorio, but then Stalled out.
I am not
sure why I picked up the book Damned
by Chuck Palahniuk, but it turned out to be a parody of Dante’s Inferno.Except, instead of a Pilgrim, the traveler
through Hell it is a dead, thirteen-year-old, precocious girl.
is spiced with sexual innuendos and some outright outrageous sexually specific scenes
(not pedophilia.) There are demons,
and rivers and lakes containing various bodily fluids.Not a read for the squeamish.
book.It has hooked me.I will
read the sequel: Doomed.
I find it hard
to post.The Trump presidency is such a
daily cluster-fuck that my poor slow cooker recipes, DYI hints, apocalyptic
climate predictions and general Maine lore shade unimportant by comparison to
what is happening to our democracy.So lately I have avoided the computer.
shocked by the reaction of the Republican Party to the blatant racism, misogamy
and maleficence of office of the Presidency that is the part and parcel of the
Trump White House.
In 1948 southern
racist Democrats began fleeing the Democratic Party when desegregation became
part of the Democratic platform.Within
a few years these southern racist democrats became a major faction in Republican
Party.The Republican party also opened
their arms to the southern fundamentalist Christians.Over the years the Republican hierarchy willingly
accepted any fringe group that they felt they could manipulate to vote
Republican; placating them by giving lip service to social policies that would cement
that base, while enacting actual policies that served the rich and
As a result,
the base of the republican became dumbed down and easily manipulated.
Then the Republican
party made the mistake of encouraging and energizing the Tea Party; and low
intelligent, uninformed masses dawned tri-corner hats, waved Don’t Tread on Me flags and, to the
surprise of the Party elites, systematically took over the asylum.
If you are a
KKK member - there is a place for you in the Republican Party; if you are a
white supremacist - there is a place for you in the Republican Party; If you
are a fundamentalist Christian that denies evolution and believes the earth is
six thousand years old - there is a place for you in the Republican Party; if
you are a moronic science denier - there is a place for you in the Republican
Party; if you are a militia nutcase advocation the overthrow of the federal
government - there is a place for you in the Republican Party, If you are an
ammosexual wearing you assault rifle into McDonald’s - there is a place for you
in the Republican Party; if you feel that women aren’t capable of making
decisions about their own bodies - there is a place for you in the Republican
Party; and if you are a homophobe…..
This is the
Republican Party that finally found their savior in Donald Trump.
This is not
the Party of Donald Trump, but the Republican party with a leader that at last reflects
the values of the party he leads.
Ham,“He’s out in the backyard building on his
Mom,“Wish he’ spend as much time working for
money as he spends on that boat.”
Ham,“He says God told him to build the boat.”
Mom,“Yes, and God tells him to go to the Happy
Hole and spend his money every Friday before Sabbath.”
Ham,“Dad says God told him there is going to be
a flood and we will need a boat.”
Mom,“you’re as dumb as your dad.We’re in the middle of a desert.We don’t need a boat.We have a flash flood every spring and we
all go up on the hill till the water goes down.”
Ham, “But dad says…”
Mom,“Oy vey .My father arranged my marriage to dumbest and old carpenter in the town,
all for a new wheelbarrow.Now I have
an ancient, senile husband and four retarded sons that are a chip of the block
of stupid wood.”
Ham,“How old is dad?He said six hundred when I asked him.”
Mom,“Holy Mother of Moses.I give up.”
year the spring rains come, and the dry river bed starts to swell. The village is leaving for higher
Noah,“Come on Mother, get in the boat.God is going to save us.”
Mom,“your drunk.And you’ve got the boy’s drunk too.”
Noah,“God told us to drink as much wine as we can
to lighten the load, so the boat will float.Now you and the girls and kids need to get in the boat – God said to.”
“Mom,“The girls and babies and I are going up on
the hill like we always do till the flood goes down.”
slurring his words; “God told me to take
two of every animal in the world, and the boys are loading them now – but there
is still some room for you and the family.”
Mom,“Two of every animal in the world?”
Japhet comes in the kitchen,“Pa, the
cats won’t stay in the boat.We’ve got
the goats and the dogs in, but there ain’t enough room for the ass so I tied him
to the back – he can swim so he should be all right.”
Japhet scratches his ass and says,“I had Shem put in two chickens and two
ducks like you said, but we only got one cow – what you want to do?”
Mom,“You’re not drowning the cow – she’s coming
there more animals in the world than ducks, chickens, goats, dogs, cats and
Noah,“Now son, did you ever see any other
Son,“Naw Pa, but people say...”
Noah,“You see, that’s just fake news.The true facts, God calls them alternative
facts, is what you see and what I tell you.Now did you load the food?”
Japhet,“We got that twenty-five gallons of wine you
made and six loaves of bread like you said, and we got the fishing gear.We can eat a chicken if we don’t catch
Noah,“You dumb fool, we can’t eat a chicken – God
said there has to be two.”
Japhet,“but why two Pa?”
Noah,“You stupid shit, so we can breed more after
Japhet,“But Pa, the chickens are both hens.We don’t got no rooster.”
Noah,“Get in the damn boat.
her head and leaves with the boy’s wives and children.
continues for five days and the water rises to three feet.
Up on the
hill the residents are enjoying the yearly community flood gathering.Noah’s
wife occasionally hears her drunk husband and sons singing sailor shanties down
in the valley.
flood recedes, the villagers return to find Noah and his sons passed out on the
roof of their house, the boat full of water and the animals gone.There are some chicken and duck bones
scattered about the roof.
Noah tells the story of the Ark and the flood to an Arab scribe who writes it
down word for word.
In Egypt God has the story read to
“Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha…”Then
he tweets: What dumb asses, so funny, so stupid.Sad
Opinions are like assholes – everybody has one;
however, some stink worse than others.
Bush got us started in the Middle East fiasco
even though Colin Powell warned, ‘if we break it we own it.’
With 22 years in the military I have seen the
results of war.I have seen body bags
stacked like cord wood on pallets waiting for the C-130 to pick them up.I have smelled the morgue in DaNang in the
hot jungle summer.I have seen an 18-year-old
kid with his guts blown out, having to deal with wearing a colostomy bag for
the rest of his life and wondering how his fiancé is going to react.
This morning I listened to the news programs and
hear all the bellicose talk by the panels, none of which have ever served in
the military, much less combat duty.
There is Turkey, Saudi Arabia, Yemen, Egypt, U.A.E.,
Qatar, and Jordan; all Sunni nations with a blood stake on peace in the Middle
East – also add Israel.Yet, we are
carrying the fight and our military people are dying, our money is being dumped
into this religious confrontation that goes back a thousand and five hundred
I have never before agreed with Trump – and I am
sure his tweet about pulling the military out of the Middle East had some self-serving
motive; but I do agree with pulling the military out of that quagmire.These
Middle East countries are more than willing to let the United States carry the
fight while their military sit on the sideline and observe.
The gas attacks in Syria are reprehensible; but
those are Sunni lives and the Sunni should handle it.Also, Israel has a stake, and they are a well-armed
nuclear nation.It’s time Israel put aside their apartheid
politics and became the broker in the Middle East
Like Vietnam, we should cut our losses and leave.When the Middle East countries realize we are
not going to carry their water, they will have to step up and solve their own
problems.If they won’t: fuck-um.
We have spent more than we ever should have in
that part of the world. Our cost has been in American lives, injured service
personnel, unreasonable deployments splitting up families, and trillions of
Any solution is only temporary: we can not solve this.
Science fiction is often the seed for science
Silicon Valley depends on rare earth minerals for
electronic products.The main provider
of rare earth minerals is China, and the supply is finite.A new source of rare earth minerals would be
valued at trillions of dollars, and the search is now on.
The newest quest for mineral wealth is in
asteroid mining.Heavy metals on earth
sink to the core and are difficult to obtain, but many asteroids are composed
of platinum and gold and other rare earth minerals; including diamond.
We are on the cusp of the technology necessary to
mine asteroids.The NASA mission
OSIRIS-REX is exploring the technologies and techniques necessary to develop
mining operations on asteroids and comets.
Commercial ventures are being financed around the
world to be on the frontier of this new gold rush; to exploit the vast wealth now
thought to be available in space.Here
in the United States investors Larry Page, James Cameron and Peter Diamandis of
Google have announced a venture company called Planetary Resources with the
goal of asteroid mining.
The idea is basically to plant a propulsion system on a near
earth asteroid and use it at an appropriate time to bring
the asteroid out of its normal orbit and place it in an orbit around the moon, or a large asteroid in a permanent orbit around earth.The
minerals could then be extracted by space crews or other methods and ferried
back to earth.
An asteroid one mile wide impacting the earth
could destroy any major metropolitan area.And less we forget, it was an
asteroid six miles wide, traveling at fifty thousand miles per hour that
impacted the earth near Mexico releasing the energy of one hundred million nuclear
bombs, that brought about the extinction of the dinosaurs.
HOW THE CHILDREN OF ISRAEL SLIPPED ACROSS A SECURE BORDER TO TAKE JOBS AWAY FROM ARABS.
WARNING – FOR ADULTS ONLY:
This story contains some of the Adult
Themes and language used by President Donald Trump.
God tweeted:No voyeurism. Fake news.
It’s a good thing to be friends with the Pharaohs. Little Adam and crooked Eve. They were
fired. I’ll build a beautiful wall and Adam will
of Israel, the Jewish people who were the incestraldescendants of Adam and Eve had been kicked
out of The Garden of Eden when God threw a temper tantrum.They
ended up in Egypt.
God tweeted:No collusion. Jews very bad people.Polls show I am very popular in Egypt.
preachers, known as Rabies, had convince the people they always suffered indignity and scorn because a woman
had caused Adam to disobey God in the Garden of Eden - damn apple
Finally, a proselytizer conman named Moses
talked some of the slaves into disobeying their Egyptian masters and flee with him across the desert.
It was an easy sell.
He promised them a new Eden that only they, the chosen people, should inhabit. He was
blindly followed by his base to the narrowest section of the Red Sea.
tweeted:Border Patrol agents not allowed to do their jobs.Caravans coming.Disgraceful.
were so pumped to be out of slavery that they partied at every opportunity
- which didn’t please Moses.
Feeling he was losing control, Moses decided to stage dramatic intervention that would so impress his congregation they would fall back in line. Having
memorized the tidal charts of Egyptian seamen, Moses knew that the Red sea
was soon due for its yearly, dramatic low tide. He went up on the side of the mountain and hid behind an outcropping until the tidal level begin to recede.
Then coming out onto a
rock shelf and carrying a couple of flat stones he
announced that God had talked
directly to him and had
given some commandments, written on stone tablets.
Moses declared the
people must follow these commandments or else they would be cast back into
·Commandment Number One was to worship
only the God that Moses proclaimed.
·Commandment Number two was to accept
Moses as their leader and direct representative of God.
Some of the
people wanted to see the flat rocks that God had written on; but they were blank,
so Moses dropped them (oops) and they smashed.One piece of the fragmented rock landed on Moses’ right foot and broke
all the metatarsals.This caused some people to laugh.
In pain and frustration Moses slammed his
staff upon the ground and begin to swear.He started throwing rocks at his congregation and calling them ingrates,
and sons of swine, and fornicators with pigs.
time, a man who was taking a dump on top of a hill overlooking the Red Sea,
came running back and announced that an army was approaching from the east.He
also declared a miracle had occurred and there was now a dry path across the
grabbed their packs and took off leaving Moses shouting and banging his staff
on the rocky shelf.
crossed the Sea the high tide returned.It was then that people realized
Moses was not with them.Some said that
they had last seen him dancing with glee on the side of the mountain as the
people crossed the Sea.
leaders tried to remember what Commandments Moses had laid down. Everyone had been drunk at that time, so
memories were not precise.Abe said that it had something to do with only
one God.His brother Seth, who did not
like sitting through daily worship services, said that he remembered Moses
saying they should worship God one day a week.Jeremiah, who was having trouble with his rebellious children, said that
children should obey their parents.Ezekiel, whose wife Ester was known to sleep around, declared that one
of the commandments had been against adultery.
It took most
of all night and thirteen containers of fermented goat piss, but it was finally
agreed that God, through Moses, had given the people Ten Commandments that they
the young God that had been given earth was spending his time watching Egyptian
military battles during the day and hanging out in rich men’s harems at night.He was not the least interested in the
idiots who were wandering around aimlessly in the desert eating grass hoppers and
drinking camel piss.
God tweeted:Dumb commandments.Jews are criminals, rapist and Drug dealers, but
some are good people.Must protect Eden
borders.Will build a beautiful
wall.Harem rumors untrue – I call them fake
news.No one respects women like God.
GENESIS: OR HOW IT CAME ABOUT THAT GOD CREATED THE WORLD
WARNING – FOR ADULTS ONLY:
This story contains some of the Adult
Themes and language used by President Donald Trump.
God was a
young god.Sometimes He would ask his Father
where He came from, but his Father would tell Him to shut up and eat His honey.
His father and Mother were always
locking themselves in their celestial bedroom with other Gods and Goddesses,
drinking wine and make strange noises - and they wouldn’t let him in.
would complain to his Mother, she would always tell him to go play.God sulk in the corner for eons.When his Father asked Him what was wrong, God
told his Father that all the other children of Gods had realms to play in, but
He didn’t have one.Finally, to shut
him up, his Father showed Him a small planet in a distance solar system and
told Him He could have that planet – He could be God of that planet, if He
would go away and leave the adults alone while they partied.
attend the Wharton School of Creation and now his father had given Him his own
planet, so he felt quite confident as a Majestic Deity .
beginning the earth was without form and void so He put on some dinosaurs, but
soon got tired of watching the dinosaurs so he killed them all.
lions; but the lions were always trying to eat each other, so He made sheep and
zebras for the lions to eat.The sheep and zebras also were hungry, but God
was tired.He said, ‘fuck-it let them
to Himself, I should have something that can worship me.Here I am the God of this planet and these
dumb animals don’t even know it.
to make an animal that looked like himself.He built a beautiful garden with six apple trees and put a man in
it.But the man was always masturbating
or else trying to mount the sheep, so God made a woman with the same anatomy as
His mother, so that the man would have someone to have sex with, and leave the
hide in the tree and watch the man and the woman fornicate, and that was cool;
but the humans He had created were so engrossed with each other, they were not
paying attention to him.
decided He would make some laws that His humans would have to obey; that way
the humans would have to recognize Him as their Lord and Master.
the two people in front of him and told them they could eat the fruit from the
other five scrawny apple trees, but they were not allowed to eat the apples
from this best tree.
‘This is to let you know who is the boss and
that you should worship me” God said.
didn’t care which tree he ate from as long as Eve would put out.But soon after God’s pronouncement, Eve had
PMS.She told Adam that God was and
narcissistic idiot and a voyeur that was always trying to grab her by her pussy.She said there was no reason for them not to
have the best apples.She told Adam he was cut-off until he grew a
pair, stood up to God, and brought her the best fruit.
about it: Obey God and have no sex, or get her the damn apple and get
laid.The choice was easy.
disobeyed God and brought Eve the best apple, God threw a temper tantrum and
ran the humans out of the orchard.
After that Eve
got pregnant, then pregnant again.After a lot of incest there were the Jewish people in the land of Egypt.