CELL PHONE ETIQUETTE

OLD MAN YELLS AT CLOUD

Yesterday I used my cell phone for the second time this year.   I called a small general store for a steak and cheese sandwich to go, on the way home from running errands.  

I got this phone in Alaska in 2005 when I was principal of three Native schools in the southeast tundra.   It was necessary I stay in connect with the schools and the district office whenever I was out of the villages.  

I pay $100 a year for 250 minutes through an Alaska communication company, and have found that I cannot find a comparable offer here in Maine - so I keep the Alaskan phone service.  

At present I have over 2000 minutes available; and though I carry the phone whenever we travel, or I am on the bike (motorcycle,) I never turn it on unless I need to make a call – which is almost never.   I don’t even know how to retrieve messages and missed calls and really don’t give a fuck.   I am not so important that I can’t wait until I get home and check my answering machine or e-mail.

I am not opposed to technology; I use TomTom when I travel, I enjoy the computer and I believe that technology is the only thing that may save the human race at some time in the future.    

But, no one needs to be connected 24/7.   No one needs to be communicating by text or telephone while driving; no one needs to have their phone turned on in a restaurant, movie, playhouse or other public venue.   The idea that anyone needs to sit in a restaurant with friends or family and check their e-mail or text is absurd and ignorant.

 

And, if you walk around with that thing that looks like a leach hanging out of your ear, and you are not an emergency room doctor on call, you are an…

Turn off your cell phone.   You are not that important.

The Ol’Buzzard

CELL PHONE SEX

I recently saw a commercial where a mother hands her cell phone to her young child to keep him occupied while traveling in her car.     The young generation is being indoctrinated to cell phone use at prekindergarten age. 

 

   Without cell phones our society would be crippled and young people would be traumatize.   

The cell phone is no longer a convenience; but has become a necessary connection to the human body.   I wonder how many people would opt for a cell phone implant?

When my wife and I were burning up the bed sheets we use to reach for a cigarette after sex.   I wonder if now the first thought of young couples in the after glow of sex is to reach for their cell phones and check their text messages?

(now after burning up the bed sheets we now take a nap.)

the Ol’Buzzard