Monday, June 25, 2012


This morning I woke up and it was raining so I went back to sleep.  
About nine-o-clock I went down stairs and made a cup of tea and tried to read a few pages from a book, but ended up putting the book down and taking a nap in the chair.  My wife and cat finally roused me with a cup of tea and an English muffing with peanut butter and banana, which I ate, drank and then went back to my nap. 

I usually call a day like this (rain on our metal roof) a Cat Day: a day where I plan to do nothing but read, eat, drink a little wine and lounge.   Either my wife or I have the authority to declare a Cat Day and the rule is that the other must immediately agree (which is never a problem.) 

Today I have carried it beyond a Cat Day and ventured into the strange realm of a Slug Day:   I have yet to declare this a legitimate level of existence, but I am experimenting with it at this moment.   The image comes to me of the big caterpillar in Alice In Wonderland (OK, he’s not a slug – but close enough.)

Back upstairs laying in bed and listening to the rain drumming on the roof I began to think about fuck.   Not the act of fuck (which if I can talk my wife into agreement this afternoon could culminate in an altered state, like a psychedelic experience of SLUG reality); but, I have been thinking about the word FUCK. 

With out a doubt the word FUCK must be the most versatile word in the English language.

Fuck it, Give a fuck, Go fuck your self, Fucking moron, Fucktard, Fuck you, Fuck me, Fuck me silly with a handy billy, Fucking-A, Fuck a duck, Fucking Jesus, Fucking easy, Fucking cunt, Fucking bastard, Fucking great, You don’t know fuck all, Fucking retard, Mind fuck, Fuck that, Fuck this, Fuck them, Fucking douchebag, Mother fucker, Bug fucker, We’re Fucked, I’m fucked, (Or as Yellow Dog Granny says:) We’re all fucked, and the list goes on…

What a remarkable word that allows so many shades of expression: Let’s fuck, You wanna fuck?, I can’t fucking contain myself, You don’t fucking like it? - Don’t fuck with me. Awh  Fuck, You could go fucking crazy thinking about this. 

Have a fucking great day.
The Ol’Buzzard


  1. I love the english language...I guess you can't say fuck on American television, but here in France, we say it all the time, because as you say, it is such a rich, fragrant, foul, expressive word, and the power of the sound makes it the perfect all purpose multi language universal explicative.
    French is fantastically expressive language, but I tell all of my friends that it's almost impossible to write great French Rock lyrics. Rap...well that's different. French pop musicians took rap and made it into something else all together. Just like the internet and cell phone culture...these people like to talk a lot, argue and compress as many words into a a single breath of air as possible....but, FUCK? Hell, you could recite the entire French Dictionary, recite the works of all the great French poets and writers and still not come up with anything as perfect as FUCK!

  2. I had one of those days on Sunday. Did absolutely nothing from sunup till sundown.
    (hope you talked your wife into, well, you know...)

  3. That part about the rain and the metal roof damned near put me to sleep thinking about it.

    You got me to thinking about my favorite fuck word and it's got to be fucktard, as in Mitt Romney, or the U.S.
    Congress. You know...he's a fucktard...they are fucktards, and such.

    My favorite fuck phrase..."I didn't fuck it up", by Katie Goodman:

  4. Fuck has always been one of my favorite words. Well okay, only since after high school. I lived in the days of nice girls. Anyway, I can't use it much now because of where I live since it is a quick path to ostracization. However, it still comes out of nowhere at times.

  5. When I was in the military I knew a guy from Scotland and his favorite saying was Fuck Say!!


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