I love
tomatoes – real tomatoes – not those tomato avatars they sell at the
supermarkets. When I was a kid living
in the Mississippi delta, tomatoes grew the size of softballs and were so acidy
they would burn your lips if you ate them whole. They tasted like TOMATOES.
The clones
we find at the supermarkets look like tomatoes, they have the color of
tomatoes, they feel like tomatoes and when you slice them they appear to be
tomatoes; but when you eat them: nothing.
When I think
about it, they don’t actually look right: they are too perfect and too shiny
and can sit on the counter for two weeks without going bad – Frankenstein tomatoes.
Our old
house was in the woods – constant shade.
Our new place is open to the sun. After purchasing some disappointing
tomatoes from the supermarket this winter, It dawned on me that perhaps I
should plant a couple of tomato plants this summer – grow some real tomatoes.
Off to my
new go-to DIY resource: YouTube.
Wow! Stick a plant in a grow bag, water it, and
tomatoes abundant. Sounds easy.
First things
first; I order six grow bags
.
The ‘plant your
garden in container’ sites say that using commercial potting soil is too
expensive and that it is cheaper to mix your own; so I purchase a couple of bags
of garden soil, a couple of bags of dehydrated cow manure, a large bale of peat
moss.
From Burpees
online catalog I order three tomato plants.
YouTube says
I need bone meal, copper fungicide and fertilizer to insure healthy tomatoes
While
shopping at Walmart I see a seed planting flat with 72 planting pockets. Why not plant some squash and cucumbers and herb
seeds – makes sense.
I had no
idea that seed packets were so expensive, so I only purchase six along with a
bag of potting soil.
I will need
some plant pots to transfer the seedlings from the planting flat.
You Tube
suggest you put grow bags in some sort of container that can hold a couple of
inches of water, because grow bags dry out so quickly. Walmart on-line has eight red dishpans that
are the perfect size on sale as a lot – and delivered to the house.
I hadn’t
figured where I would keep the planting flat while the seeds germinate – no window
in the house will accommodate it. While
at Tractor Supply I find a green house for sale for $39.00 – seems reasonable.
There is a
problem; if I put the green house on the lawn the grass will fill it in no
time. Land scape cloth is available at
Walmart for $16.00, but you also have to buy the pins to stake it to the ground
for $6.00. What the fuck: in for a penny
in for a pound. I should be able to
cover a 10x12 area to plant my container garden.
I still need
a trowel and a watering nozzle for my hose.
Will probably have to go back to Tractor Supply.
What the
hell is happened to me? All I wanted was
a few tasty tomatoes.
the Ol’Buzzard