Wednesday, December 27, 2017

A BUZZARD EGG OMELET 2017






Why do we need a C in our alphabet?   You could easily replace it with a K and 90% of the words would sound the same.   For the few words where K won’t fit an S would work just fine.



And let’s drop the requirement for U to follow Q … qeen, qack, qake, qeer.  It would make Scrabble easier. 



Nobody ever lost money underestimating the intelligence of the American public.       P. T. Barnum






A child understands nothing, and clings to faith because it lacks knowledge.    Salman Rushdie 



I didn’t wash today.   I wasn’t dirty.  If I’m not dirty I don’t wash.   Some weeks I don’t have to shower at all.   I just groom my three basic areas: teeth, hair and ass hole.   To save time I use the same brush.
George Carlin



I would enjoy living in a sane asylum.



Hanlon’s Razor:  Never attribute to malice what can be adequately explained by stupidity.  



If all civilian ammo clips were limited to nine rounds the Orlando night club shooter would have had to reload 23 times.




A Texas sharp shooter:  You shoot a hole in the barn door and then draw a target around it.



You can never wade in the same river twice.






It is not that I am obstinate; but if I were to drown my wife would first search for me up stream.





If militia nuts want to carry and play army with assault weapons they should join the Marines and actually defend the Constitution of the United States - but most wouldn't make the intelligence cut.   





Why do vampire hunters always arrive at the crypt just as the sun is setting?






Americans are at the bottom of competency test in math and science when compared to other industrialized countries, which accounts for their willingness to buy into the most outrageous fallacious claims. 
Philip Ward 









EARTH’S POPULATION
1800:  1 Billion
1930:   2 Billion
1960:   3 Billion
1974:   4 Billion
1987:   5 Billion
1999:   6 Billion
2012:   7 Billion
11:47 a.m. 12/22/17:   7,590,879,794
2050:   10 Billion projected










If you are preparing for the zombie apocalypse you have a long wait; because regardless of what Christians chose to believe, zombies do not exist and never have.





Logic Argumentum ad Ignorantiam – something is so because it has not been proven it is not so… and the reverse.



All politics is local.   All education is local.





A single sperm has 37.5 megabits of DNA information.   A normal ejaculation transfers about 1,587 gigabits in about three seconds; and you thought 4G was fast.
Unknown – but I read it somewhere












Homo Sapiens have expanded to 7 billion and we threaten every other species on earth.    Marcus Chown



There is someone in my head and it’s not me.   Pink Floyd





Sex is a bad thing because it rumples the clothes.  Jackie Kennedy



For we live to know is known
And all we seek to keep is flown
Let life than as the day flower fall
Tamerlane - Poe




There are surely other worlds than this – other thoughts than the thoughts of the multitude.   Edgar Allen Poe



We are just an advanced breed of monkey on a minor planet of a very average star.   Stephen Hawking









DID I RUN and AM I TIRED?

the Ol’Buzzard









5 comments:

  1. My only quarrel here is the species we're threatening. Yes indeed, every large complex organism is in danger, but insects ... nah.

    ReplyDelete
  2. That is so true. Every vampire movie I have ever seen, and I've seen most of them, the hero always arrives at the coffin right when the sun is down. So much for being a smart hero.

    ReplyDelete
  3. and from my favorite modern American philosopher:

    “The four cornerstones of the American political psyche are 1) emotion substituted for thought, 2) fear, 3) ignorance and 4) propaganda”
    ― Joe Bageant, Deer Hunting with Jesus: Dispatches from America's Class War

    May 2018 be a better year for all of us, OB.

    ReplyDelete
  4. earth will survive..the human race will not.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Well, you covered it ALL in this post! LOL!

    Happy New Year to you and your lovely wife. Wishing you all the best in 2018!

    ReplyDelete

COMMENT: Ben Franklin said, "I imagine a man must have a good deal of vanity who believes, and a good deal of boldness who affirms, that all doctrines he holds are true, and all he rejects are false."