WHAT OLD PEOPLE TALK ABOUT

TIRED OF HEARING ABOUT THE WEATHER?

YOU CAN ALWAYS TURN IN TO POLITICAL DEBATES 

When we were younger I use to laugh with my cousin that the old people we knew seemed to only talk about the weather or their illnesses when they got together.

Well now I'm fucking old.  I am not on the make, I am not partying, I am not traveling, I am not having wild adventures, so I claim the right to talk about the weather (I'll spare you my aches and pains.)  

  Yesterday (February 12th.) the high temperature was 9 degrees; today the forecast is for 13 degrees; tomorrow 2 degrees, the next day 23 degrees and the next 46 degrees - what the fuck?

This is February, Maine's deep freeze month; to wear long johns or not to wear long johns - I've never had to make that decision before...   I'll just keep on the long johns and complain.  

the Ol'Buzzard

FORTY DAYS AND NIGHTS OF RAIN

So far we have had three days of torrential rain here in western Maine, but there are still thirty-seven more to go to match the Biblical downpour.   It makes me wonder if Pentecostals are beginning to sing and dance and talk in unknown tongues, and lining up for the Rapture.  

Did you ever really consider what cataclysmic event would be required to drown the entire earth in forty days and nights of rain?  

We have mountains here in western Maine just shy of four thousand feet in elevation, and that is small for many ranges.   It would have to rain one hundred feet a day during the forty days and nights in order to cover these mountains and drown the people of Rangeley, Maine.  That amounts to approximately four feet an hour.   At four feet am hour rainfall the atmosphere would be so heavy with water you would drown just by breathing.   In other words, God probably wasted thirty-nine days and twenty-three hours of rainfall during his rage against mankind. 

But, fundamentalist people continue to believe verbatim the story of Noah and all the other fables of the Bible.   These people are as dirt ignorant as they are enthusiastic for their religion.

However, they are also enthusiastic voters. 

the Ol'Buzzard

DELAYED MAINE WEATHER REPORT AUGUST 1, 2014

A DELAYED POST

When I was young my cousin and I always laughed at what the aunts and uncles talked about when they got together.   The women always talked about their ailments or people they new that were dead and the men always talked about the weather. 

Even today when I write my cousin (the only kin that I keep in touch with) I always begin the letter with the weather.   Perhaps it is something in my DNA.  

Well, the temperature here in the western Maine mountains was sixty-six yesterday and it is fifty-two and foggy this morning.  

It seems a little early but there are already red leaves starting to appear on the maple tree in front of the house and on the sumac along the road.   This could be the sign of an early fall and long winter. Perhaps I should consult the wooly-bully caterpillar. 

I still have one more cord of firewood to have delivered.   So far I have about two and a half  cord in my woodshed and that is what I expect to burn in a normal winter; but better too much than run short.  

Some folks might think that the beginning of August is a little too early to begin thinking about winter – but they don’t live in rural Maine.    In Maine you are either in winter; relived to see winter go; or thinking about the next winter.  

Don’t get me wrong: I love winter – especially that first crisp white snowfall of the year.   Winter is why we choose to live in Maine.  

the Ol’Buzzard